DEAR FANFICTION WRITERS FROM HARRY POTTER CANON WORLD
by AuthorAndrewCharlusPotter
Summary: This is a conversation before the canon harry potter world decides to take teaching us a lesson by causing Armageddon for this world, our world aka wizarding god's human half's world, just so you know. This is what we get for writing non-canon shipping stories. I warned you and if the caldera does erupt quite soon, just remember that I warned you.


Fanfiction Writers and all.

This is a conversation between canon ships that is about their canon selves reading fanfics and got upset, enough well, to see you well, you'll find out, eventually.

The Harry Potter World's Revenge on Fanfiction Author's World, The Wizarding God's Human half's world, where no magic, only passive magic exists, but not any active magic whatsoever except divine magic(I.e Jesus Christ's miracles in the Biblical times are considered divine magic and active magic as well, too.)

2001

The Burrow...

Everyone reading on their own personal muggle laptop and everyone had a scowl on their faces.

This includes, Bill, Fleur, Charlie, Percy, George, Ron, Hermione, Harry and Ginny, Luna, Neville and everyone knows whom they are supposed to be with it's called canon ship for a reason.

Ginny snarled, "That bloody buggering does it, how are we going to teach these arsehole writers a damn lesson."

Harry said, "I agree with you, Gin, but how these arsehole writers are in the wizarding god's human half's dimension's earth, they can't be gotten to."

Hermione humphed, "They better, be gotten to but I don't know why they put me with anyone other than Ron. Humph."

George said, "Whom do they pair you with, Granger?"

Hermione laughed, "Sometimes it's still a Weasley, sometimes Charlie, or mainly Fred unfortunately. Don't they realize they are disrespecting the dead."

Harry shook his head, "They believe we are all fictional which means we don't even exist, especially in our own little parallel earth, meaning I beleive that we may have muggle actor counterparts, whom are most likely still alive and well, quite opposite from our original personalities. Meaning they take the actors personalities and see us more or less, I know we know some of our actors, Daniel Radcliffe for me, Emma Watson for Hermione here, Bonnie Wright for Ginny, Tom Felton for Draco, Rupert Grint for Ron, Evanna Lynch for Luna. Those are the only ones important, while this Ginny may never like Draco, that take Tom's personality and incorporate it into Draco's which is far far far from the damn truth, while Felton may be a nice guy, whom coincendentally I can see crushes and all, but true to the core love not really."

Ginny said, "Ridiculous, I would never fall for Draco or the actor that played him, but my actress counterpart may different and deserves a well-placed hex, as does Emma Watson. Well all of them do, mainly my bat bogey hex and all."

Harry said, "Any ideas, how to deal with our actor and actress counterparts or the other world in general?"

Bill said, "Normally I would say curses but I don't think that's what you had in mind."

Harry laughed, "Nope, I'm thinking about travelling personally to their world under assumed identities and well, have fake names for each of us and well, I believe there is a super volcano in yellowstone, that is past overdue an eruption?"

Hermione nodded, "yes, but Harry isn't that a bit extreme?"

Harry asked, "Do you want them to continue to write Harmony stories, or Dramione stories."

Hermione humphed, "How come they can't see a damn resemblance between me and your bloody aunt petunia, remember I have buck teeth which is a key component in most equine animals. Even though I did get rid of my buck teeth and all, during 4th year, but still shouldn't that have been a clue."

Bill said, "Yes, I can't believe Dumbledore would obliviate James and Lily of Hermione, well Harmony now Hermione, but once we talked with his portrait, we did indeed found out why."

Neville shook his head and sighed, "Yep, all because of me, because I do kind of agree with Dumbledore vision, that I would've definitely joined Voldemort and killed him and then became the next dark lord and in retrospect Harry adn Ginny would've gotten together sooner, as he would've been training under the auror spells, or at least secretly."

Harry said, "Yes, I'm surprised me and Ginny ended up soul-bonded during her rescue in his vision, but how come it didn't happen this time around?"

Neville said, "Well, not only did you not know what love really is, the crush unfortunately stopped the soul bond from performing as we all know, you were married last year on Halloween and were soul bonded, albeit 7 yrs late and all."

Bill asked, "About soul bonds, how come they have multi-bonds or multi-soul bonds, don't the idiots know all soul-bonds are supposed to be monogamists, unless, of course, well the damsel-in-distress rescue betrothal bond is involved of course and they don't even bloody pay attention to the Potter curse, what do they believe that all Potters used a love potions on all of their wives even if they did, they shown love and respect and support and protected one another and that is not a love potion and no Potter would ever go near dark magic, well not dark magic love blood amourous potions that is."

George said, "What I don't get is why they assume Ginny's a gold-digger, that's far from the truth, she and Harry love each other, is that so much to believe."

Harry said, "I think they believe I fell in love with her because she looked like my mum or have a mummy-complex of some kind and all. As if I would've fallen for a look alike of my mother puh-lease get a grip on reality idiots. Yes, while in your world that may be the case but we have rules and the rules whom you so continously ignore is the ruler and ruleress rules and all, and the fanfiction author, who criticize at least he's trying to fix what you brought onto yourselves. Bugger-Damn Sheesh Shite."

Ginny humphed, "As if I would have the time to brew such potions in the first place, true we did spend an entire summer at Grimmauld Place and I did find the said potion, but they don't realize it requires certain ingredients and it takes at least 10 to 20 yrs to brew to make sure they stay together and not get divorce."

Arthur said, "About that, I know muggles have that, but they don't pay attention, do they, magicals never divorce and we don't have divorces at all what makes them think we do."

Molly said, "i believe Arthur, they used Celestina Warbeck as a scapegoat to allow magicals for divorces, but what they don't realize is she married muggles, and meaning gotten muggle-married only, not magically married, which prevents cheating, and other immoral acts from ever taking place. What interests me, is how some people think Ginny is a long-lost sister of Harry why is that, I literally given birth and have the scars from her bloody head still, try squeeze a cantelope through a tomato opening, and I did and they all survived."

The children yelled, "Too much information."

Arthur said, "I think it has to do with Ginnys' red-copper style hair color, rather than a clownish orange like the rest of us."

Molly nodded, "So what, lots of Prewetts and Weasleys have variant shades of red hair color in our families including red-copper."

Harry said, "What about the other worlds, where they paint Mrs. Weasley as some cheater of some sort, in one of the stories Ginny's my aunt when she is my fiance and all, and Molly had sex with my grandfather, which however, Ginny was born 1981, while my grandparents died 1977. Key thing to remember folks, Ginny Weasley is a full blood and full choromosomal Weasley. True there are blood chromosomal adoption which even if it was a possibllity, I believe that Molly would've secretly breweed the blood chromosomal adoption potion to make sure all the weasley were chromosomally which means it rips out whomever the true father's choromosomes were and replaces it with the adopted father and vice versa with mothers, sheesh."

Molly said, "i hate to admit it, but that is definitely true, if i was like that, they would never stay the original chromosomes for very long, in the bloody first, making them a true Weasley again, as well as True Prewett sheesh."

Harry nodded, "What about the cheating during marriage, don't they know the magical bonds, forbids cheating in our world, because if husbands and wives cheated on each other with exes or enemies of the so-called husband/wives and all, don't they don't the affairs even the wife and husband would die as soon as the first cheating orgasm happened?"

Arthur said, "I don't think they pay much attention logically to this stuff and all., but what are we going to do and all."

Hermione said, "As much I hate to say this we need to find a way into The Wizarding God's Human's half's world, no matter what the cost to us would be, but what do we do when we get there."

Harry said, "First most of the men, and some women, namely our wives. Will take a CDL course and we rent or buy a huge tanker of propane and then drive it into, or trespass into the Yellowstone National Park and well, we pour the propane straight into the fountain or the geyser, I forget the name."

Hermione answered, "Old faithful?"

Harry nodded, "Yes, Old faithful, we pour propane into every geyser including old faithful and wait for the fireworks to happen and we set the bloody place on fire in hope of well."

Hermione said, "Perhaps it would be better to get our credentials here and just drive straight through the portal and hopefully we land in yellowstone."

Ginny nodded, "That's a good idea, Hermione and then we escape back to our own world in hopes for the best."

Ron nodded, "Alright, I'm down."

A year has passed and every couple and single of the Weasley family along with Neville, Hannah, Luna and Rolf, even Harry and Ginny had their own personal tanker truck filled to the brim.

Harry somehow wondered how the Elder Wand healed itself, and shown up in his families vault but knowing this portal traveling spell it should work.

Harry yelled, "PORTALIS, TRAVELIS, AD WIZARDING GOD AND GODDESS HUMAN'S HALVES MUNDOS, AD YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK WYOMING. allow these tankers to pass through harmless with humans inside them.

A Shimmering Portal appeared before them and everyone drove their tanker truck into the humongous portal and it stayed opened until the last tanker passed through which was Luna and Rolf's."

Scene Change.

Wizarding God and Goddess Human Half's world.  
Yellowstone National Park.  
5:00am. 

They all had tasers and add the tasers to theri wands which allowed active magic to work in this particular world and froze all of the rangers around the campsites even the guest buildings.

They poured propane into every single hole and geyser and fountain they could find until the geysers, fountains, and holes over flowed wiht the propane and they parked the tankers next to Old Faithful in case they needed a bigger explosion.

6:00am.

Old Faithful Erupts at 6:15.

Harry and the rest of the canon harry potter's world, lighted a muggle matches and dropped onto the propanes' trial. after conjuring the portal to travel back to their own world in hopes of teaching these said fanfictioners a lesson.

They heard the geyser erupted along with significant other eruptions knowing Yellowstone supervolcano was active once again. to teach these idiots a lesson. The Harry Potter gang may it back to their world safe and sound.

Back in the Wizarding God Human Half's world.

The Wizarding God known as Charles has a human name Casey.

Casey woke up and felt the eruption taking place. and checked the time 8:00am. and shook his head, "I warned you all, now you all have to pay the price. Meaning Supervolcanos erupted all around the world as well at the same time, the yellowstone's caldera erupted. signifying the end of the earth of this world as we knew."

Families made up and ex and potential lovers found another, and they became a lover for the last time, before the darkness and volcanic winter starved them to death. That was the in that world.

Fanfiction Writers aka Wizarding God's Human Half's world was finally destroyed. in the year 2020. while the wizarding was was 18 yrs behind the Fanfiction Writer's worlds.

Back in Harry Potter world, they opened their laptops and typed in and the results of any type of harry potter fanfiction ceased to exist. and they all lived happily ever after. after teaching the idiotis fo the Wizarding Gods human half's world a lesson, never mess with canon ships or you won't live to see tomorrow.

THE END.


End file.
